When I turned 30 my life fell apart. I always thought that when I entered my 30’s I’d have my life all figured out. I thought I’d be happily married with 3 kids and a toy poodle. I thought I’d have the 5 bedroom Victorian house with the 2 car garage and the white picket fence. I thought I’d have my own business that I was passionate about and not be a slave to corporate America. I thought I’d be living my truth outside of New York and finally gotten out of the rat race. But the reality turned out to be quite the opposite. At 30 I was still living in New York City, working for a demanding company, and with someone romantically who I wasn’t sure if we even had a future together. Looking back I think the Universe wanted to shake things up for me.
I turned 30 and shortly thereafter got laid off from my job and dumped by my boyfriend. Neither of which I saw coming. Both were totally unexpected and huge bruises to my ego. I was at an all time low and found myself with extra time on my hands so decided to do some soul searching. I took a trip to Dubai with 4 of my girlfriends in hopes of having an ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ moment but instead it was more of a Sex in the City 2 vibe. I returned to NYC more lost than ever before. After some persuasion from a friend, I decided to explore meditation. I fell in love with meditation. A friend had previously recommended the local Kadampa Meditation Center and I started going weekly. If you have one nearby, I cannot recommend it enough. The speakers are brilliant, charismatic, relatable and so welcoming. Kadampa got me hooked on guided meditation. Shortly thereafter I started exploring different meditation avenues and tried Transcendental Meditation (TM) which is a more advanced meditation.
Guided meditation is a type of meditation that is led by a teacher or practitioner. Guided meditations may include oral instructions about mindfulness, attention to the breath, body scanning techniques, and guided imagery or visualization. Guided meditations are usually structured and follow a relatively simple format.
Transcendental Meditation (TM) is meditation where you silently repeat a word or ‘mantra’ over and over again. You generally only need to say the mantra when you are distracted with thoughts. When you experience a distraction in the form of thoughts, images, sounds, or body sensations, you return to repeating your mantra.
The benefits of meditation are limitless. So many studies have effectively proved the benefits of meditation. The benefits are not simply in the form of mental health but also your physical well-being. To name a few, the benefits of meditation are reduced stress, improved sleep quality, increased focus, strengthened immune system, reduced anxiety, improved memory, and so much more. Even a few minutes a day can have a profound effect. For me, meditation feels like a massage for my brain; I don’t know how else to describe it.
Finding time to meditate before I had a son was hard enough. But finding time now is near impossible. However, I’ve noticed that when I do carve out the time to mediate now I am a much better version of myself and I’m a much better mother. I’m lighter, I’m calmer, I’m happier. I’m wiser. I’m kinder. I’m more empathetic. I’m more authentic. I’m more available. I’m more patient.
Now is when I can benefit from meditation the most. I think I’ve been avoiding meditating because when I’m not tending to the baby I feel like I should be doing doing doing. Doing the laundry, doing the dishes, doing household chores, etc. There is this constant need to stay busy, however, in stillness is where I find clarity in peace.
There are so many resources available to you. A few that I’ve used and loved are the following:
- MWH Fitness + Wellness app – Melissa Wood Health blew up during the Pandemic due to the ease and accesabillty of her app. For $9.99 a month (or $99 annually) you get access to a library of meditations as well as workouts. Feel free to try the 7 day free trial for new members
- Insight Timer – this is an app that I’ve been using on and off for free for years (there are also in-app purchases). There are so many amazing meditations to use depending on your needs. From anxiety to deep sleep, they have such a good variety and I’m sure you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for
- Gabby Bernstein Miracle Membership – for $114 for 6 months or $190 for 12 months you can be a Miracle Member; this app has hundreds of meditations as well as weekly coaching, quarterly challenges, and workshops
- Headspace – this is probably the most popular meditation app, for $12.99 per month (with a 7 day free trial period) or $69.99 annually (with a 14 day free trial period) you have hundreds of meditations at your fingertips. Headspace is a leader in mindfulness and meditation through its user friendly app and online content offerings
- Netflix – Headspace: Guide to Meditation – if you already have a Netflix membership (with plans starting at $6.99 per month) then you can access this meditation series. The series spans eight episodes taking viewers through the benefits and science behind meditation. Personally, I really enjoyed it
- Kadampa Center – as mentioned above, the Kadampa Meditation Center is a great resource for New Yorkers. Most classes cost anywhere between $10-$15 per session for in-person classes (which is a bargain in NYC). Most major cities have Kadampa Meditation Centers so please google it and see if there is one near you. Additionally, during the Pandemic, they introduced online courses (some as little as $5 per session) so if you don’t have a Kadampa Meditation Center nearby, online is a great option
As you can see, you can attend special meditation centers or group classes. But you can also practice meditation just as easily on your own from the comfort of your home by using an app.
I’ve even heard about mommy and me meditation classes. I think Zoe might be a bit young for it but I look forward to when he’s old enough to join in on the fun. Starting him off early will hopefully create a solid foundation for him.
I highly recommend meditating. And if that doesn’t work, tequila has never let me down lol.
